Britney Spears is drunk and topless

Wednesday, August 08, 2007


In news that won't even shock my mother, Britney Spears was caught topless making out with a man she just met.

The Sun reports: Britney’s assistant hand-picked Mike and a group of male pals to go to her hotel for drinks by the pool. Mike explained: “Britney was drinking Mojitos and she’d been drinking some Jack Daniel’s. Suddenly she shocked everyone by just stripping out of her top. She went into the pool topless - her boobs were exposed and she had a drink in her hand and a hat on with sunglasses. She straddled me and put her legs around me. When I started kissing her I did everything in my power - from my previous experience of kissing girls - not to mess it up. Britney had more drinks - she was having Jack and more Mojitos in between me feeling her up, her boobs, and kissing her on her neck. Her body was very nice. It was sexual and sensual kissing. It took some effort to perfect. She is a great kisser - I’d actually say a phenomenal kisser.”

Whatever. This whole thing is completely disgusting. Making out with Britney would be like licking the vagina of a pregnant Sperm whale.


Posted by Unknown at 8/08/2007  
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