Oprah Almost Dies From Her Fatness

Friday, October 06, 2006

World famous fat ass and lesbian, Oprah Winfrey, collapsed from heat exhaustion during a recent visit to her hometown of Kosciusko, Mississippi. While opening a boys and girls club, Oprah fainted when the temperatures got too hot for her weight to handle.

An onlooker claims: "Just as Oprah was about to cut the ribbon, she collapsed. She was getting dizzier and dizzier, she started sweating profusely and her vision became blurred. Her knees were buckling under her and she nearly blacked out. Oprah quickly stepped back and found a seat. She tried to revive herself by putting cool compresses on her head and drinking liquids. Oprah made light of the situation, telling everyone it was due to the heat."

The only thing I hate more than people who respect Oprah are fat people. Oprah is really working with a double whammy, because she can't change either of those. You never see a bear wrestler or street fighter collapse from cutting a freaking ribbon, because they're in shape. Oprah really needs to spend more time on a tread mill and less time biscuits with gravy.

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Posted by Unknown at 10/06/2006  
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