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Eva Longoria was rushed to the hospital after she fell on the set of Desperate Housewives. If anybody still watches this damn show, you'll be glad to know she won't miss any work due to her ignorance.

Her rep said:"Eva slipped on one of the stairs coming out of her trailer. Nothing is broken, but her ribs are very bruised."

I always look at people who fall down like they're second class citizens, maybe even peasants. I have never fallen down once in my life. Ever. And I never will, because I'm not some dipshit who can't walk and breathe at the same time. The only people more asinine than people who fall down stairs are people who run up the stairs using their hands and feet like a dog. Yah, you know you're friends with these people, don't pretend like you have no idea what I'm talking about.

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