Wilmer Is Probably Banging Scarlett Now

Friday, July 07, 2006

TMZ is reporting that Wilmer Valderrama, who has banged girls like Lindsay Lohan and Mandy Moore, could now be having sex with Scarlett Johansson. Wilmer was seen hanging out in the Hamptons with none other than Scarlett Johansson at his side. They were spotted on Monday night at Stereo House, and then later at celeb-boite Star Room.

They want on to report: "Though TMZ's eyes and ears didn't notice any canoodling between Valderrama and Johansson, the pair did seem to stay very close to one another most of the evening, and were noticeably camera- and query-shy."

Wilmer has better game than most men could ever dream of. I'm not even sure he's really an actor. He's only really played Fez on That 70's Show. It's not an impressive resume. I'm pretty sure he's a wizard of some sort. Maybe he even wears a big pointy hat and drinks goat's blood in front of fires all night, because I really don't understand how he does this. Whatever magic he's doing, I want to learn. The last time I had a girl come over to watch Sleepless In Seattle, she left after 10 minutes. I know I just met her on Myspace, but I figured she wanted me to watch the movie nude, covered in hot butter.

Posted by Unknown at 7/07/2006  

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