Jamie Foxx Wants 100 Lap Dances
Monday, July 03, 2006
Reports are saying that Jamie Foxx wants to celebrate his 100th birthday with 100 lap dances. Foxx wants to have nothing but naked woman and booze for his 100th birthday.
He said: "For my 100th birthday I want 100 dances. Five 20-year-old strippers, that equals 100. Sweet."
I sat here with my graphing calculator for a half hour and couldn't figure out how his math works. I'm guessing he just means 5 girls will give him 20 dances each, but he isn't really saying that. If I'm confused, you should be confused. I've been considered a genius ever since I taught myself quantum physics by simply decoding cave drawings in the Mayan ruins. And I also know someone who majors in forensic molecular biology, so that basically makes me an expert. And I have a 10 pound penis, ladies. Call me.