Mischa Barton Is Nice

Thursday, June 01, 2006

The New York Daily News is reporting that Mischa Barton and her mother, Nuala, looked like the perfect pair when they visited the Central Park Ritz-Carlton, but Mischa really wants to shoot a cross bow through her mother's throat.

Star magazine saw the two getting into the elevator together, and Mischa was furious when her mother couldn't work the elevator key. She said: "You're so fucking retarded!What idiot can't put a fucking key in? You're so stupid — it takes you 10 hours to do anything!"

Some people will frown upon Mischa for this kind of behavior, but clearly she likes to listen to eminem. She's just another warped mind of our generation. This talk actually turns me on. It makes me want to play a game of kick ball with her, and when she doesn't expect it, throw a magic dagger in her back. The dagger would only temporarly paralyze her, but she would be totally conscious...obviously. After the magic dagger wore off, she would stand up and start cussing me out, at which point we would start passionately kissing. Well, I don't think I need to draw a picture for you.

Posted by Unknown at 6/01/2006  
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