Celebs, Hot Celebrities, Celebrity Pictures

News.com is reporting that newly-separated Hollywood babe Jessica Simpson allegedly wore the new fashion must-have - "butt inserts" or gel pads - to give her a fuller derriere in The Dukes Of Hazzard. This gave her the look that all women are going for, according to Cosmopolitan.






This is pretty amazing considering this means I've been fantasizing about sticking it in a bunch of gel pads for about a year. Seriously, who does she think she is? I've been masturbating to a bunch of gel pads. I don't know how many times I can repeat myself in one post, but I'm cocaine heart attack level insane. I remember when I was younger and my older sister told me there was no Santa Clause, I was crushed. As bad as that was, it doesn't even come close to the amount of betrayal I feel today. This is worst than the time my ex girlfriend put a blindfold on me and let our goat give me a blow job. I don't feel well. I'm going to go lay down.